Thursday, November 11, 2010
What do you *really* wish you were doing right now, and how soon do you think you can make it happen?
This question almost seems insidiously designed to generate guilt. And regret. But maybe I’m reading it that way because of who I am, and not due to anything inherent in the question. I actually had a lunch conversation with Nagle, Dave H and Nick K about how I don’t feel my current job is quite good enough at satisfying my ambition, despite the fact that I am content and happy with it. Perhaps in some ideal parallel narrative, Dave Guskin went on to become a renowned physicist and did great works. I don’t think I wish I was that Dave Guskin, exactly, but some of what he’s accomplishing (assumedly) is in line with what I wish.
I wish I was doing something that was world-affecting in a positive way. I enjoy working in games and entertainment, but I feel it’s kind of a highest-order (like, high on the food chain) happiness for humanity. A better way would be to work on lower-order happiness, ways to improve all of our lives for generations to come. To that end, I think I should get back into physics, but I don’t think I can honestly make anything like that happen for about 3-5 years. It definitely requires planning of a sort I haven’t been comfortable doing recently.
One good thing I can say about financials: they are an excellent barometer of one’s (financial) independence, and I am far from being able to quit my paying job for a noble scientific (penniless) pursuit.